An Open Letter To My Future Wife

Dear Future Wife,

I hope you’re having a great day so far? I would have loved to talk with you in person — you know that I love hearing your voice — but I guess this letter will surfice.

The rate at which couples are getting divorced these days is quite alarming. Gone are those days when you hear about couples celebrating thirty years anniversary. Although I can’t promise that we won’t disagree on some issues, I can promise that none of our future arguments will end in divorce. I’ll try my best to always make sure we settle our misunderstandings amicably.

A lot of men stop doing all the things they did to get their wives to fall in love with them once they’re married but I’ll be an exception rather than the rule. I really enjoyed the thrill of trying to get your attention and how you gave me a hard time; I enjoyed that challenge. I won’t stop proving to you that I love you. Although I can’t love you forever, I will love you till the day I die.

About the issue of infidelity, you can trust me on that. I have a very good role model; my dad. I’ll be faithful to our marriage vows by not cheating on you with another woman. You will also have to be faithful to me.

I look at some married women and just shake my head. Why? Because they look shabby and unkept. Please don’t stop dressing well and looking pretty. I won’t be jealous if men admire you when we go out together. But keep the flirting at a minimum level. I’ll also endeavour to dress well.

“The way to a man’s heart is through the stomach”. The first person who said this must have been like me. You know I love eating and I’ll be glad if you can cook delicious meals. I especially love spaghetti and amala. I will help out in the kitchen whenever I can.

If there’s anything else I want to talk to you about you’ll receive another letter from me. Bye for now.

Your Love,
Adewuyi.

P.S. — Please don’t kiss your current boyfriend but if I’m that current boyfriend…………………

The Gambler

“This time I’ll win”, Wisdom thought in his mind. He was at a betting shop and was about to place a bet on the football matches that’ll be played later that day. Wisdom collected his bet slip from the bet agent and he promptly exited the shop in high spirits. While whistling, Wisdom walked slowly on the tarred road oblivious to the things going on around him. He was about to walk past a food canteen but he decided to enter the canteen and buy his first meal of the day. Wisdom sat down at a table without greeting any of the people already sitted. After he’d ordered what he wanted to eat he brought out his mobile phone and he opened his Facebook app.

A lovely teenage girl placed a plate of fufu and egusi soup on the table before Wisdom and then she left to attend to another person. Wisdom washed his hands in the bowl of clean water that had been placed beside his food by a boy of nine and he started eating. He ate slowly like he always did but he was slower than usual because he wanted to spend a lot of time at the canteen. Although his hunger wasn’t fully sated he didn’t order for more food because he didn’t have enough money with him to pay for an extra meal.

The pretty girl came to clear the plates and to collect money from Wisdom. He felt the urge to flirt with her but he stood up from the chair he was sitting on and walked out of the canteen.

“I have to win this time”, he kept thinking in his mind while walking. Wisdom had used the last money with him to pay for the food he bought. He walked aimlessly for sometime until he got to a shop where video games was been played. He greeted his friends and sat down on one of the benches. Wisdom wanted to show his bet slip to a close friend but decided not to do that. He watched the game of soccer been played on one of the screens and wished he had some money to pay for a game also. Wisdom stayed at the game shop till it was dark and then he left and headed towards home. He was still living with his mother at a two-bedroom apartment.

Wisdom knew that his mother wouldn’t be at home; he had purposely stayed out late so that she would have gone out before he got home. His mother was a nurse at a hospital and he knew she was on night duty that day. After he had eaten the food she left for him, Wisdom sat down and watched a show on T.V. He occasionally checked the matches he’d placed bets on to see if he was winning. Wisdom ticked the ones he won till there was only one match left. He started smiling because he was sure Barcelona was going to win the match. Wisdom started planning how he was going to spend the money he was going to win. He slept off about thirty minutes before the last match started.

*****************************

The first thing Wisdom checked when he woke up around 4am was the result of the match. When he saw that the result of the match was draw his heart sank and he felt like crying. How was he going to pay his friends the money he was owing them. Wisdom hoped his mother wouldn’t notice the money he’d stolen from her purse before he left home the previous morning.

Adewuyi.